Inner trauma
Inner trauma
'When I thought I was still four years older than Sumire, I held myself back a lot. But this guy who is six years older, couldn't keep his dammed hands to himself?'
Toh shakes his head. He is a psychologist, he should understand that there are many different people out there. But, does Nagawa Sano not have any common sense? As an adult, he should have known better.
"So, while I still wasn't quite sure what it meant I let him gradually do what he wanted. Those harmless kisses became more passionate. He would lick, suck and bite my neck and gradually other parts of my body. There was a time where I had to keep wearing long sleeves because he was leaving too many markings. I think it was four months in our relationship where he first saw my body. He walked in on me changing, and after that-"
"He lost control?"
Sumire bit her lip and Toh could feel her trembling.
'This is worse than I thought. How can Tsueno show a guy like that so much sympathy?'
"After that he started to want to see me naked more often. Whenever I'd stay over, he would make sure he was hugging me to sleep naked."
He hugged her tighter and Sumire paused. "Should I omit some details? I can tell your angry."
"Anybody would be angry." Toh hissed. "But continue."
He needs to know everything, so she has a comfortable experience.
"So during those times, I would be incredibly nervous. But I tried to relax as much as I could. Yet sometimes, I'd feel something rubbing against me and I'd wake up to Sano kissing me in different places. The first time I found him like that, I almost hit him. But I relaxed when he told me he loved me, and how precious I was. I actually confined someone about this experience and they called him toxic and weird. At that time I defended him."
Toh interjected. "That's called stockholm syndrome."
Whispering sweet words in her ear, just to keep her under control so she doesn't suspect anything is amiss. Whenever she felt uncomfortable and expressed it. That bastard would cover it with sweet words, and Sumire. Innocent Sumire would believe him and defend him in front of anyone.
Sumire flinched, sighed and nodded. "I didn't realize it was weird. It just felt normal. There was a time, where I was coming back from my job and I was in a rush to see him. So I took a cab, without doing my usual checks. I noticed the cab was going in a different direction from Sano's apartment, and the driver insisted that there was a road construction in that place. I found it weird, so I sent Sano a message. But when Sano tried to ring me, that alerted the driver and- well he tried to assault me."
If he wasn't angry before he was now. Toh felt his blood boil. The bastard ex aside. Why does this girl have to go through so many traumatic experiences? It's no wonder she has no faith left in the world, it's no wonder her morals have disappeared. Who would have any morals left when all the world does is betray her and show her it's ugly side?
"He got very close. I was drained of strength, I had been fighting all day and I lost blood since I was using my abilities. I couldn't fight back as much as I would have liked. I was going to resort to use my ability to create an opening one last time, so I can at least exit the car. But, before I could San showed up."
Something tells him this won't end up being a sweet rescue story.
Sumire continued. "At first he hugged and comforted me. But afterwards when he was asking me questions. He got angry, threw me into the back seat of the car and started touching me. He tied my hands up with his jacket and-"
She was crying at this point and Toh turned her around to wipe her tears. "Ssh." Toh said softly. "Ssh, I'm here. Your not with him anymore Sumire, your with me."
He will never do something so violent to her. He didn't think it was this bad. He knew Nagawa was a bastard. But considering how Sumire still seemed to care for him. Toh assumed that maybe there was still something left to salvage about that guy. However, the more he listens to her the more angry he felt.
'Just once more after this trip, I will go see the bastard and hit him.'
"I-I was confused. I didn't understand. He suddenly got really angry and pushed my legs apart. He kept asking me if the driver entered me, and what places he touched. I-I'm not as you know very familiar with intimate situations. The terms he was using, I didn't get it. Knowing this, Sano must have assumed that something happened."
"But, he didn't take your first time then?" Toh wondered.
There is no doubt that Nagawa Sano is a bastard. But, Nagawa never took her first time.
'I was the one who did that. The sheets were bloody after our night together.'
Sumire shakes his head. "I think, my tears and pleading got to him. Moreover my wound, he must have seen that and stopped. But, after that time. I became painfully aware of how much he truly wanted me. How he was expecting more of me. I kept trying to act normal around him. However, after we had dated for awhile. Sano suddenly wanted to introduce me to his friends, at the casino. I ended up very drunk, and Sano left for a moment. His friends tried to assault me like the driver did. After having experienced before, I didn't just sit still and tried to fright back. But those drinks had been drugged."
'I won't just him once, I'll break his bones and maybe that favourite part of his body.' Toh immediately understood that Nagawa set her up. He did it, so he could play hero, rescue her and whisper sweet words. While convincing her that 'he will make the horrid memories go away by doing it with her.'
This man, there is no redemption for him.
"Ru rescued me, thankfully he had a job that time. The detective in charge of the case was very suspicious of San. He kept persisting asking me questions. But I was naive."
Toh frowned. "Surely you suspected something?"
She isn't stupid. Despite what others may say, Sumire didn't enter a relationship with Nagawa Sano blindly. Surely she knew they would have their difficulties. Surely she felt the danger when she saw Nagawa's friends.
*Unedited*