Something genuine
Something genuine
Sumire laughed. "That would be a sight to see. Mr psychiatrist, since we met, you have always remained so calm and composed. I wondered what it would take for that calm composure to vanish. But, I didn't expect-"
'I didn't expect it to be me.' Sumire couldn't finish her sentence. If she admits it allowed, then it's like admitting that she is somebody precious to Toh.
How can that be? They have not known each other that long. How is it possible that Toh cares for her this much? This is wrong. This is all wrong. She cannot give him her heart completely. If she does, she will end up in more pain.
Keep calm, Sumire. Do not forget that this happiness and joy is fleeting. It will not last.
Toh smiled, almost like he understood. "Our first date. When would you like to have it?"
His sudden change in topic surprised her, but Toh probably wanted to stop talking about Sano.
"Date, um, I don't know about a location. However, I will soon be swamped with work." She recalled her name on the list of participants on the sheet Masato showed her.
She could refuse it, but it would only lead to more rumors and angry looks from the rest of the students, which is something she doesn't need right now.
"Busy?" Toh repeated.
Sumire picks up a sheet of paper she tossed earlier. It was a letter from the school about the details of the concur. They sent it quite some time ago. Had she been home, she would have realized. The deadline to participate was Wednesday. So she still had a few days. But since she left it this long, the school probably thinks she is going to accept.
"So, are you going to play the piano?" Toh asked, interested.
"Mm, I thought about it. But, I'd rather not compete with Masato." She trailed off. "If you hear Masato play, you wouldn't want to listen to me anymore."
"I am sure that is not true. I have only heard you play a few times, but I like listening to you play."
'I like listening to you play.' It was just six words, and she had heard them before. But there is something genuine, something sincere about Toh's words.
"Thank you. But, I think this time I will go with the violin."
As for the other violin participants, her gaze fell on Arashi-senpai and Atushi's names.
"Is something wrong?" Toh followed her gaze. "-are these people-"
Toh must have sensed her distressed emotions. Sumire takes a deep breath before she explains everything to Toh. If any normal person heard what she said, they would judge her. Sumire thought no matter how patient Toh had been with her, this time. He wouldn't let this slide.
But his composure remained as calm as ever. He didn't judge her, and there was no look of contempt at all.
"I see. So, what will you do?"
Toh's question surprised her.
"These two guys suddenly appearing now is most likely because they learned you were attending the school. The president guy must have been too busy abroad and only just learned of your presence. As for the other guy, he has either been searching for news on you or the other guy, and him kept in touch."
Sumire paused, hearing the last theory. Indeed, it wouldn't be shocking if they kept in contact. But it felt strange. She was always under the impression that they didn't like each other very much.
"No matter which one it is. They even went so far as to do this." He points to the participant sheet.
Sumire frowned. "Right, Arashi-senpai must have spoken to the principal so I could participate."
Toh shakes his head. "No, I meant they went so far as to ensure they could participate."
She looks at him, confused.
"I haven't heard the other two play before. But there is no doubt that you were chosen as a participant naturally."
Masato also said something similar, that she was one of the first ones that were chosen. A content sigh escaped her lips when Toh ran his fingers through her back and hair. He truly knows how to make her feel at ease. She enjoys his touches. He always touches her like she is somebody special. She is nobody important. She is filthy and doesn't deserve even this moment of happiness. But, just for a little while longer, she wants to be selfish.
'I know in the long term they cannot continue this way. However, for now. Just for now-' Her thoughts break off seeing how Toh was looking at her.
She felt her cheeks heat up. "Can you not look at me like that?"
"Why not?"
"For one, it's embarrassing, and-." Sumire hesitantly caressed his cheek. "Instead of looking at me, maybe you should remove the alcohol out of your system and drink."
Toh's face still looked flushed.
"Hmm, do you have anything to eat? I didn't eat dinner yet."
Sumire nodded and quickly got off his lap as she walked towards the kitchen. She feels him follow her into the kitchen but doesn't turn around as she takes the leftovers from the fridge and puts it in the microwave.
Sumire awkwardly turned around, not liking the silence. "Uh hi?"
Hi? Sumire wanted to slap herself. Why is she acting like an idiot? They had only just started dating last night, and she still had a hard time processing this newfound relationship between them. She hasn't had time to process it properly.
Toh seemed amused since his lips curved into a sly smile. "Hello, love."
Sumire freezes, hearing his endearing way of calling her.
"S-so, it's not much. Just a few meat dishes- uh, you can-" Her sentence fell short when Toh leaned forward.
"I see you're nervous," Toh mumbled. "But, I want you to understand, Sumire. That I am serious about this, we can take it slow since I know you don't feel as strongly as I do."
Her gaze dimmed upon hearing Toh's words. Unfortunately, she couldn't refute them even if she wanted to.
However, she didn't get a chance to feel miserable for long when she felt Toh brush his lips against hers again.
"May I kiss you?"
Sumire stared at him dumbfounded. Does he truly need to ask? But seeing the look in his eyes, she nodded.