Something Beautiful and Wicked

After Shi Ailin washed up and changed into a white, pale-pink flowered print housedress, she went to find Luo Wanting. She took her extra time in the bathroom, lathering herself with delicate and sweet and pleasant smelling soaps, and she immersed herself under the scalding water.      

Shi Ailin remembered her way to the kitchen, so she went over until she realized no one was there, not even the little boy she met earlier.      

She searched around the first level of the house, not finding anyone in sight, so she then decided to go outside through the back entrance they came from.      

Outside, on the field, she watched as Luo Wanting loaded a truck by carrying sacks of freshly peeled beans. His white shirt, along with his ash-blonde hair—silver under the sun—was drenched with sweat.      

Shi Ailin walked down a slope to catch up to them. Nianzu smiled and waved for her to come over. She hastened her steps, and Nianzu said, "It's a good thing we have your husband here." Shi Ailin didn't bother correcting her on the state of their relationship. Still, they have been pretending to be married as an explanation for why such a young couple kept travelling.      

Nianzu continued, "I usually have a group of men that help with this stuff since my back is not doing any good these days, but there was a landslide on the road just east from here. The clean-up and traffic will block them for a good eight hours, at least."     

Shi Ailin glanced at Luo Wanting, who used his shirt to wipe the sweat from his brow.      

"Is there anything I can do to help?" Shi Ailin asked Nianzu.      

Nianzu gave her a warm smile. "My granddaughter is on the left-field picking some potatoes. You can help her."      

Shi Ailin listened. She then stalked over, finding a young woman, shy of fifteen years of age, hauling potatoes from the root with a hoe.      

"Hello," Shi Ailin said.      

"Oh, hi, there," the girl smiled back, wiping the sweat from her brow, leaving a smear of dirt. Straightforwardly, she continued, "you can take the other hoe right there and start hilling these up."      

Shi Ailin listened and helped them. Half an hour in, her arms were growing tired, and her mouth was dry.      

She stole a glance at Luo Wanting, who removed his shirt before he resumed his work, his muscles rippling as he kept himself busy.      

When she turned, she noticed that the girl was gawking at him with parted lips and a flushed face of both curiousity and wonderment. Shi Ailin smiled. She understood that look. It was the same glance she'd secretly give him whenever he wasn't looking. It was the same expression she wore when they'd met and the feelings she had for him but been avoiding.      

She used to be a best friend to Luo Tian—even dating him briefly—therefore, she had known the Luo's for years. But Luo Wanting had always put up a stone-cold and aloof exterior. Even when they were younger, he didn't bother acknowledging her existence, despite being around, and he treated her like a pest. Although she liked Luo Tian at the time, she always gave Luo Wanting a double-take whenever they crossed paths. She had forbidden thoughts about him. Her gaze lingered on him—too long for comfort, and she never allowed those feelings to flourish, not until now, and he wasn't speaking to her.      

"Is that your boyfriend?" the girl asked Shi Ailin.      

Shi Ailin smiled subtly. "Something like that," she answered.      

"What's wrong?" the girl caught onto her voice, her expression.      

Shi Ailin shook her head and sighed. "Nothing to trouble you with," she replied. "Just adults being adults. I promise you."      

The girl pouted. "No one ever tells me the details. I'm old enough!"      

Shi Ailin chuckled.      

…     

By the evening, Shi Ailin and Luo Wanting shared a meal with Nianzu and her family, which consisted of her daughter, her two grandchildren, and her few neighbours as guests. Shi Ailin wondered about the father of Nianzu's grandchildren, but she knew it was impolite to ask.      

After dinner, Nianzu asked Luo Wanting to do some work outside of the house, and he accepted it with no hesitation or protest.      

Shi Ailin took it as an opportunity to seek him out privately when no one else was around. She found him standing on a ladder as he fixed the light bulbs on the patio. She watched him work, and when he finished, he packed up the tools he used, and headed over to the shed, steadfastly avoiding her.      

She trailed after him.      

"Wanting," she called out.      

He kept walking.      

The sun kept sinking, and it was nearly all-dark outside. He went inside the shed, putting the stuff he borrowed away.      

Shi Ailin watched the back of his profile. He wasn't facing her, but when she called him again, he stopped. Luo Wanting then turned his head slightly, his eyes dark, more grey than green, and he didn't say anything.      

Shi Ailin took a deep breath, her chest rising. She straightened her body as she said, "Listen. I'm sorry for not listening and for abandoning our stuff, and getting us into near—potentially deep—trouble," her eyes then met his. "But I'm not sorry for buying something that belonged to my family. It meant a lot to me, even if it's just an item. It's sentimental, and I thought I'd not have another chance or a choice."      

Luo Wanting narrowed his eyes, as he finally spoke. "Ailin. If it meant something to you, I would have gladly stolen it for you, but only when we had a plan or when we are prepared to take on such action. We're lucky that Nianzu's property was nearby to conceal ourselves from being chased."      

Shi Ailin swallowed. "I'm sorry. But I think if you'd been more honest with me, things would have been different."      

His eyes widened. "What do you mean about honesty?"     

Shi Ailin hesitated to answer. Luo Wanting chuckled darkly, as he started to walk away. She clenched her hands and then she chased after him. She grabbed onto his arm, forcing him to halt.      

"Listen. It's not that I don't think you're dishonest. You just don't let me in," her voice trembled weakly. "So it makes me act on my own without rationally thinking. I'm not blaming you. I behaved recklessly. I just…want you to open up to me more because I always feel left in the dark."      

Luo Wanting turned to face her, and he pulled her in against him. Shi Ailin widened her eyes as he closed in on her suddenly, caging her with a warm embrace. "Ailin," he whispered so low and softly that it sent a surge through her spine. "I'm not used to sharing details of what I do or how I account for my actions. I'm learning every day because I never had"—he pointed between them—"this or any relationship that required the feelings to be reciprocated. My mother didn't treat me as a son; my father ignored me; my brothers only care about themselves." He squeezed her tighter. "I don't know what it means to hold items with sentimentality. But I care about you, and that is why I was upset. I'm sorry, Ai. I will try harder to be a better man for you."      

She was crying, but her face didn't twist. She looked at him with awe. Shi Ailin grabbed his face, and she shook her head. "You're doing fine. I, myself, could learn to listen to you."      

He laughed. "You don't always have to," he said, caressing her hair from her face. "You can learn to make your own good judgement. I know you can."      

Shi Ailin wiped her tears, chuckling. "I still have a long way to go."      

He smiled briefly before his expression changed. He then stepped forward, his eyes hardening with lust. Her breath hitched.      

Luo Wanting grabbed her hand, descending his lips, kissing each of her knuckles tenderly. He then reached out to trace the hollow dip of her collarbone. Shi Ailin responded by sliding her hand up his muscled arm. He lifted her chin with two fingers, as he lowered his head, kissing her flushed lips senselessly.      

"Wanting…" she moaned.      

He shot her a devilish grin. He then took her hand, leading them back inside the house.